She mounts the steps to her temple, minding carefully the cracks in the ancient stone. Centuries ago the pillars crumbled and the roof fell. Now her stride is uneven, but she still walks with the pride of a goddess. The language is lost, her pride would never have connoted a hint of hubris. It once… Continue reading Terra’s Temple
Re-uploaded 7/22/2018 as part of the Archive Restoration Project. This past weekend, my partner and I met with a Crone (pagan term of respect for wise women who’ve moved beyond the Maiden and Mother phases of the Goddess self) who was uninterested in being respected for her age. She told us that every seven years… Continue reading 7-Year Cycles and Time Perception
This summer, I didn’t write on my 23rd birthday. I was working in the wilderness and a friend and coworker insisted that I take as much of a break as possible. I slept under the Colorado stars and read sections of a high fantasy novel, and the camp coordinators slipped some candy into our provisions… Continue reading Birthday Post 4: Being 23 and a Half
This is part of my restored archives. http://www.jeubfamily.com/2009/03/13/above-fulfillment https://web.archive.org/web/20150529063223/http://www.jeubfamily.com:80/2009/03/13/above-fulfillment When I started blogging, I wrote about being haunted by the words in a song (I still do that all the time). The song is called “More to Life” by Stacie Orrico. It goes like this: Here in this moment I’m halfway out the door On… Continue reading Here in this Moment
Archive restoration note: in this post I referred to God as “Infinite One,” but I no longer believe in a higher power or intelligent design. -Cynthia, July 2018 Today when I stepped outside, I felt the words, “Take off your shoes and make this ground holy.” I grinned and thought, “It’s been so long, Infinite… Continue reading Bare Feet on Broken Ground
“I thought the reason I wasn’t happy, why I didn’t fit in, was because there was something wrong with me. I wasn’t doing it right, I wasn’t trying hard enough.” I’ve heard it from so many people. They looked like rebels and misfits at the time. This one’s for you, rebels and misfits. The people… Continue reading To the Imperfect Ones
I used to really hate emotion. I didn’t think it was logical to trust your feelings. What do your emotions know? They’re just a distraction or an obstacle to doing the reasonable thing. As it turns out, intuition is ridiculously helpful. Our subconscious awareness is way ahead of our conscious awareness a lot of the… Continue reading Compassion as a Prerequisite to Questioning
The mask I’m grieving is a forced smile. This makes therapy difficult, because many of the solutions to depression include focusing on the positive. My counselors have said they’re working with a rare case – usually they work depressed people toward seeing the bright side of life, but I worked my way to depression through positivity. I… Continue reading When Positivity is the Problem
Trigger warnings: current events and politics “By voting, you are complying. You are complying to a preexisting system. I think we need real significant change, and that real change won’t come if enough people are complying. While you see voting as expressing yourself, I see it as compliance with the system.” -Russell Brand, who explains not… Continue reading How I Got Burned Out On Current Events and Politics by Age 19
Note from April 9, 2021: This post was first published on October 27, 2014. I just found it this morning among my unpublished drafts, and decided to write a note here for the 468(!!) of you who will be getting this old piece of writing among your emails today. I take your attention seriously and… Continue reading Appreciating the Ride