I feel like I have written myself into a corner. I was fueled with rage when I first committed to writing about my experiences, and now I’m stuck with having to write down the details of my traumatic past.

It’s triggering to work on my memoir. I’m trying to work on trauma recovery so I can actually finish it, but it’s going to be a lengthy process. I’ll be lucky if I have something to show for it ten years after starting it.

I think I have disappointed a lot of my readers and supporters, because I keep promising that I’m working on it and I have very little to show for it.

I am working on it. It just doesn’t look like writing for several hours a day and pumping out content. It looks like a mess of emotional devastation and a nonlinear journey of recovery from a complicated past. I have a full team of professionals working with me, and they all agree that mine is a complex case.

My siblings and I used to quote a line from Winnie the Pooh that went, “It’s a long story…even longer when I tell it.” It’s a funny line, but it perfectly describes where I’m at.

I’m educating and improving myself with school and therapy. That is my work right now. I will write when I can do so with clarity and context.

Thank you for reading along as I learn how to be a person in the real world.